Antoinette de Lisser, Head of Marketing, Absolute Post / Photography by Uzo Oleh

Why bother about racism?

“You’re not really cut out for this...” The start of my journey into Adland. A negative. NO. Jamaican parents drummed in hard work and I just needed a new route. Adapt.

Coutts bank to Interbrand. A highly privileged environment to an educational one. Degrees, coming out everywhere. Intimidated. Brand Valuation – fascinating. Along with my first experience of redundancy and big cheques!

Media Buying next via nepotism. Laughing and having fun – while providing a valuable service. Redundancy came along with a new experience: racism. The class-action kind: 9 Black women. NINE. 5 floors. ALL departments. What a coincidence? What Just Happened?

I didn’t understand or feel this until later. Adapt again, this time with a cheque to live and experience Greece.

More media followed then the headhunting experience (later employed and established); the second, a much smaller, sexist, FMCG-led media independent, then headhunted into broadcast, Carlton TV.

A TV franchise: presenting as a multicultural TV station (1992) a dream come true. Proud to be headhunted. I fit. Truly. Opportunity manifest. Not for the colour of your skin – drive, ambition and enthusiasm, raised on that. They trained the rest. Happy. Sadly, here I experienced racist career moment TWO.

Feelings of the first arose, this HAD to be the last. (It wouldn’t and won’t…) I’d never experienced anxiety. What to do? Who to turn to? What’s worse? My skin colour had reflected my work. Created a problem in me.

I felt physically sick. Couldn’t eat. I felt so small. Insignificant. Different. Alone. Black. All the remarks were suddenly clear, all the way back to right now. This moment.

Then the anger built. Frustration followed.

This changed me. Forever. I’d hit the wall.

There was something that needed to be discussed. Addressed. My difference. I was now being treated differently BECAUSE of the colour of my skin. (Memories of a 1980s Geography lesson about Apartheid spring to mind here).

For the first time and many years into my career, supporting myself, living and loving my London life. I had to stop. I had to find out WHY, and what that was and is. What was staring me in the face that I couldn’t see? What was this feeling? RACISM.

The description wouldn’t, couldn’t and shouldn’t have applied to anyone else in my department.

It took a while to report this to management. I couldn’t continue; my integrity and moral fibre broken. My colour had become an issue. Externally. 2001.

Any new job I’d be WEARING my skin, loud and proud. I did. I do.

This experience has me re-evaluating the way I look at our business, every single day.

The next two roles were the exact opposite. I was listened to. I was heard. A deeper confidence. Hurt and traumatized by the experience; it took counselling to establish that’s what it was. Trauma. At work. I’d taken roles that were literally built around me. I was happy, supported and colour was irrelevant. My skills, brain and self were.

Then Diversity. New word. Old game.

25 years later: I’m a Pitch Superwoman Alumni, who now supports POCC (an “OG”), Iconic Steps and the Westminster Council Creative Forum. Using my network and experience to mentor and speak out. I felt let-into-“the-club”, privileged and complicit at the start of my career and now, an industry veteran: I can’t turn the other cheek. I’ve run out of cheeks and have landed on them more than once.

It’s hard work complying to this constantly shifting framework and adapting yourself to the old new cyclical attitudes. While finding out who to work with and their views and values. WHEN will it be TRULY open to all and no new words need inventing? Our business needs to adapt, change is imminent and I cannot wait to see the future.

Antoinette de Lisser, Head of Marketing, Absolute Post

I cried over my laptop when I first read Antoinette de Lisser’s story – thank you so much lovely lady for sharing your journey.

To those who are new to my Sundays at 2:30 Storyletters, you’ve arrived at an interesting time. We are at the special stories by others stage, which I mentioned last week. These were commissioned for the Pitch Senior issue. I asked Senior Talent of colour to write about their life and career journey, including times they’ve faced racism, how it made them feel, and how they pushed through to continue their journey to the top!

In light of what’s happening in the world right now these stories are even more poignant.

This week I have had calls, emails and messages from several people within our creative community checking in. Some also asking me how I can help them do more about racism in our industry.

I have my views and my thoughts, which are often different to others, but no one has all the answers.

Change won’t happen unless we all move together. Our creative community shapes culture. Through our work we can help create a society we all want to live in.

I have an idea.

If you are ready to roll your sleeves up alongside me to make it happen do get in touch.